Thursday, September 29, 2011

8.5 miles

What I learned running 8.5 miles today.

I got to practice my spitting.

I got to feel the warm, wind on my skin.

I got to listen to some of my favorite songs.

I discovered I didn't want to die during this run.

My legs are sore but I am happy.

Tuesday, September 27, 2011

Something happened on my way to bed last night. My husband came into bed (where I was reading) and squeezed my thighs. With the biggest smile on his face, he happily squeezed my thighs and had such joy on his face at something I had that made him so happy.

So, as I am barely breathing today in my Wasn't-tight-two-weeks-ago jeans, I laugh. I laugh because no matter how much I run, no matter how much I diet, my thighs will always be "juicy". And instead of peeling these jeans off and go for my sweats, I am still in them in the hopes that they will stretch out enough to make it the rest of the day. So, if you see me a little lightheaded you'll know why.

On an up note, I am grateful something I have makes someone I love so much...happy.

Monday, September 26, 2011

Do you ever sabotage yourself? Do you find you throw your hardwork out the window and give up all the work and let yourself go? I've been doing this all my life. I think that's why I've been losing and gaining the same 10 lbs. since I've been twelve!!

Being fat when you grow up poor is kind of embarassing quite frankly. We didn't have the best diet. We had lots of white carbs-rice. Rice for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Usually if we had pork or chicken, my mom believed that the fat is where the flavor is so she never trimmed the fat.

I digress. I didn't know the mathmatics of losing weight back then. I had no control over what was served to me. However, I had control over portion size. But I didn't exercise this concept. I ate for any reason. I just ate too much. Food was and still is such a comfort for me. It's also how I punish myself.

When I feel not good enough, I eat. When I feel I don't deserve to feel this good or have this life-I eat to sabotage away the weeks of sensible eating.

I didn't catch myself this weekend. I felt I let my family down because my son got sick. Did I push him too hard all week? We had to cancel several plans due to this and I think I felt horrible about not making the commitments. So I ate. And ate. And ate.

On Friday I weighed 135 lbs. I woke up this morning at 137.8 lb.!! I've been losing and gaining these three pounds since May. Seriously. Over and over. As soon as I get to 135-I feel like I can give myself a break.

Why is my break a nose-dive into bad, bad unmentionable foods. Now, these food in NORMAL portion would not show up on one's body but in MASSIVE quantities, it makes you not be able to stand wearing jeans. So depressing.

So, today, I am on track again. For today. Why can't I get it together?! It's not about the food-it's about how I feel about myself. I've got work to do...

Friday, September 23, 2011

Updates and Ramblings

S.E. the big first grader is transitioning from half-day to full-day is going so-so. He told me last night he misses his brother. Besides not seeing him for part of the day, we moved S.E. into the den so he has a separate room. (I just have curtains and bedskirt to finish before I post pics). He is playing soccer and in Cub Scout and although he is grumpy at first, once he's on the field, he enjoys it. I think it's because he doesn't have much downtime after coming home from school. We miss him a lot at lunch.

As for the Koo. He is loving Kindergarten. He loves playing with brother and others at recess. He loves life. When he comes home from school, he still hugs us in front of the bus and once lunch is done...he's off to play. He's been really good at playing by myself. And he's so animated on the soccer field. I can hear him joking and just going for the gusto with getting to the ball. He's such a joy because he tries so hard.

Lastly, lovely husband has given up coffee. It's been almost a month and I'm not sure what he's trying to avoid about coffee because after lunch, he has a Coke Zero which has caffiene in it. This morning he asked me to make him so decaf coffee. Fine. Okay. Whatever there. Besides this, he's been very helpful with the home refreshing. He's helped paint, put up pictures, change out lighting (yay!!), and move a lot of furniture around.

And for me, I'm still trying to race against I don't know what/who to try to be there for my kids and stay involved in their lives. I still read a lot. I'm reading about three books/week. Right now, I'm trying to read all of Jude Deveraux's books. I'm still going to get treatment for my skin and resisting the urge to mop my floors more than once/week (the kids have been learning to pour milk by themselves).

What have you been up to? I hope you are where you want to be.

Wednesday, September 21, 2011

Today I have to rest as much as possible. I have been going non-stop the past few days and I can feel it in my skin. Several patches on my legs which were flat have now flared up and starting to itch.

When I spoke to my doctor, she re-iterated how much stress plays into my immune system and how I have to get off the Gerbil wheel and find downtime. Too much stress makes a girl's skin crazy.

So today, I will not run or workout along with any DVDs. In addition, I will not work on any projects or run around like a madwoman. My couch and I are going to be one for I need the rest to help my skin.

I'm trying not to panic right now...

Wednesday, September 14, 2011

We went to my lovely's company picnic/carnival on Saturday and entered our names in a drawing for gift certificates and prizes.

We won an iPod Shuffle. I feel so trendy now. When I workout, I have my tiny MP3 player with all my favorite New Wave, Hip-Hop, Rock and mushy music on there with big ole cheap headphones.

I have not been a fan of putting plugs inside my ears but my lovely has convinced me to try it. So if you see me looking like all the other folks running with white plug ins you might think "what a cool and trendy runner". :-). I have never been cool in my life.

Monday, September 12, 2011

Crockpot Roasted Chicken

This has become my favorite way to fix chicken. No fuss. No heating up your house with the oven on in the summer. Just plug the crockpot in and 5 hours later, you have the most delicous, fall-off the bone, impress-your-man chicken.

Here's what you do. Clean a whole chicken. Place in crockpot. Spread some of your favorite seasoning salt on top (we love Johnny's seasoning salt). Turn on high and in 4 1/2 to 5 hours, you have roasted chicken. Note: no extra liquid is needed.

It makes for two meals at our house. My men like the dark meat so they have this with some sort of veggies. Whatever is leftover, I make into chicken soup.

Saturday, September 10, 2011

Obsese. Yup. I plugged my numbers into a free calorie counter website and with my BMI...I am in the OBESE region. Yikes. Never have I ever saw that coming. I'm still fighting to stay in the 130's but I guess I need to fight harder.

Now with my skin doing 80% better and my itchiness has gone down quite a bit, I feel like I can tackle this area of my life again...and again. But this one word has sent me in more of a panic mode than when my size 8 jeans refuse to allow me to breathe when wearing them.

Obese. There you have it folks.

As dreadful as I feel when I hear this word associated with me, it doesn't tell the whole story of me and how I got this way.

I've been stress eating myself to this word pretty much all of 2011 when my body ached, shivered, tired out, broke out in oozing rashes that drove me literally unable to stay still because I would itch myself to the point of bleeding. Now, as I crawl out of this health hell-hole, I will fight another fight with the scale and this time, without all the beforementioned, I will keep on working my way to a healthy body.

Friday, September 9, 2011

Just did Jillian Michaels' 30-day shred video...the first workout. It was hard. I used to do all three of the workouts at one time consecutively. But instead of getting sad over my state of health, I kept going and cheered myself on because I'm not itching and two months ago, this would have been impossible. So proud of myself and thank God all the time.

Tuesday, September 6, 2011

Da bus is da bomb

Okay so I feel so spoiled. This year, our neighborhood got bus service for the kids to and from school. I rode the bus when I was young. I didn't get that this was a priveledge-not a right until S.E. started school last year and there was no bus service in our little vinyl village. The carpooling to and from school for 9 months was mind-numbing-I hated the bottle-neck at school and the dodging kids and bad weather was enough to make this already grumpy personality I have even more grumpy.

I am so thankful for this service because it has allowed me an extra 40 minutes to just do something for myself. Today, I scrumbed and primped my narly feet (TMI I am sure but that's what I did). I would never do this before. I would be ironing lovely husband's work clothes, mending things for people, or just running around doing errands for or with the kids.

So thank you bus drivers for taking on the job of taking my lovies to and from school and for offering your smile to my kids.

Monday, September 5, 2011

The Pokeman phase. The boys can't read yet. Yet, they know the names, numbers, and order of Pokeman cards.

Mama doesn't get it. Mama can't make heads or tails of it. But mama does enjoy listening to them divvy up the cards and battle. The wonders of little boys. I know the ins and outs of girls. I love God's humor because I needed to know more about boys...Thank Heavens.
I need to take a moment to celebrate my progress. Since my skin problems started a little over four years, I have put a halt to any updating to my house that might cause me to further exasterbate my condition.

To with great caution, my husband and I decide since my skin has been looking great and the weather is still nice enough where we can air out our room-we finally painted the last four, white walls in our home (pics will come when we get done).

I haven't broken out. I haven't scratched during sleep. I just want to jump up for joy!! I have to remember moments like this because health is a gift. Sorry to sound so dramatic. I am just so grateful.

Friday, September 2, 2011

Boring lamps to Va-voom lamps

My friend Dee showed me how re-cover my boring Costco lamps. I think it turned out fantastic if I do say so myself.

I had tried in the past to recover lamps but I'd end up with bubbles or it was a sticky mess. Before I would use spray adhesive to stick the fabric to the shade. It was very unforgiving. This method, I used tacky glue (the all-purpose gold-colored bottle kind) and went to work.

To clean-up the underside, I bought roping and glued it on (not shown). I'm so happy to have this done because I've been wanting to do this for over a year now.

Peanut Butter and Chocolate Chippers

Warning!!! This recipe is so good and easy, you might have to curse this blogsite for having this recipe on here. I got this recipe off of another website and now I can't find it so I can't give credit where credit is due. Nonetheless, I feel it a duty to re-publish this recipe because it's ooohhh. so. Good. Another reason I love this recipe is it does not require a TON of butter.

Peanut Butter and Chocolate Chippers

6 T softened butter
1/4 cup creamy peanut butter

1/3 cup white sugar

1/3 cup brown sugar

1 egg

1 tsp vanilla extract

1 1/4 cup all purpose flour

1/2 tsp baking soda

1/4 tsp salt

1 cup or less chocolate chips

Preheat oven to 350F. Beat together butter, peanut butter, sugars, and egg until creamy. Add vanilla extract and give it another whirl to incorporate. Stop the mixer and add the dry ingredients except the chocolate chips. Again, blend until fully uniform (~less than 1 minute). Add chippers and blend. Drop teaspoon about 1 inch apart and bake for 10-14 minutes depending on cookie sheet type and oven.

It makes about 2 dozen cookies.