Wednesday, September 30, 2009
I am afraid of success or getting to a weight that should make me magically happy. It's not and there will never be that number. I am working on learning to like what I see in the mirror instead of obsessing over the jiggly parts I still have floating around. Why can't my mental self catch up with my physical self so I can not want to eat everything in sight to try to make it better. So self-defeating...awful.
Tuesday, September 29, 2009
Monday, September 28, 2009
So today, armed with the memories of the show and my genetic predisposition to keep everything, I am going through each room, closet, underneath each bed and anywhere in my house where I have shoved unwanted stuff I don't want to deal with and either bagging it up to take to the local thrift store, make use of it, or just plain chuck it. This fall clean-up and de-cluttering event helps me less cranky about being stuck in my house when the snow comes.
It makes me feel better to get the clutter out of my house but this year what's has been hard is getting rid of the "toddler-type" toys they don't play with anymore but I haven't had the heart to part with. If I continue to store it in hopes of someone making use of it when they come to play-it just makes a big mess in the family room and just sits there. So, I am trying to be a big girl and get rid of it. I am just not that organized and won't remember that it's there.
Friday, September 25, 2009
I wish I enjoyed blogging as much as her or have 30 hours in a day instead of 24 hrs. Here's her site in case anyone stumbling onto my blog wants to look at what a real blog should look like: www.thewwchick.blogspot.com.
Applesauce Oatmeal Pancakes (Taste of Home April/May 1994)
1 cup quick-cooking oats
1/4 cup whole wheat flour
1/4 cup all purpose flour
1 TBSP baking powder
1 cup skim milk
2 TBSP applesauce
4 egg whites
Combine dry ingredients in a bowl. Add wet ingredients and mix. Let sit about 2 minutes. Pour batter by 1/4 cupfulls onto a heated griddle coated with nonstick cooking spray. Flip after about 1 1/2 minutes. Serve warm with syrup and leftover applesauce. 2 pancakes / serving
Thursday, September 24, 2009
Tuesday, September 22, 2009
This year, S.E.'s swimming has been coming along nicely. In today's swim lesson, he was able to swim to the teacher a bit without any help. I believe the swim lessons are making a difference in addition to him being more confident because he is understanding the whole being in the water thing.
Sunday, September 20, 2009
So, I very calmly got a towel and made Koo sit down and scratch his heart out. He had to KEEP SCRATCHING. Once he was tired of scratching, I made him put his tennis shoes on and run around the outside of our home. He crying and carrying on about how he didn't want to scratch anymore and that he couldn't run. Upset and tired, once he calmed down, I hugged him and talked to him about not scratching S.E. and how this is not how we deal with being mad or not getting his way. Then I outline how this will be even longer if he chooses to scratch his brother again. I hope this works for a spell. I have so much to learn and I am just getting older and lazier.
Saturday, September 19, 2009
S.E.: "Sure mom, I will get a machine and shrink down and you can cut your tummy up and put me in there."
S.E.: "Mom, can I bring my Transformer too?"
He is getting so big and he has been growing-I am so grateful to have gotten to stay home to watch them grow. Too fast.
Monday, September 14, 2009
- I'm in the best shape of my life
- I have the most wonderful husband
- My kids are delicious and I am thankful to have two of the most healthy boys
- I have a home and don't have to worry too much about what's going on with the recession
- I have health insurance
- I have great friends
- I have my eyesight so I can read lots and lots of books
- I love cooking
- I keep on trying to do better
Sometimes when I am feeling depressed, my insecurities really take hold and I can't find my way out for days. I think these are normal feelings but I really don't like them. As cheesy as the list above is-I need to see it in writing to help me get out of my pity party.
Sunday, September 13, 2009
Friday, September 4, 2009
Thursday, September 3, 2009
This year, as I reocver from this flu and eating everything, I get a little sad. I hate the beginning of school and now that the boys are going to start next week at preschool-I get anxious like I'm the one starting school. It really never ends huh? How cruel that we finally celebrate no more school, just to be pulled back in by my kids going to school.
I have to be honest and admit I have not been a good parent for a good month now. I have had little patience and have not been finding joy in parenting. My heart is out of the game and I am worn down by the monotony and frustration that comes with trying to not lose my cool when the %$#@ hits the fan (which happens every 30 minutes). In the past, I would go seek out books or call friends to help me get out of this funk, but frankly I don't care right now. Calgone, take me away.
All this ho-hum attitude I hope is from my weakened immune system and frail muddled mind. Hopefully, my cup will be half full again soon and I can begin to appreciate my kids for what they are-kids.