Friday, July 25, 2014

Flying Scared

Why do dumb, dumb people have access to weapons that can take down planes and ruin so many lives?!!

I am so overwhelmed with all the bad news in the world and here in the U.S.

Aren't you?

Am I terrible if I stop watching coverage/documentaries on how our lives are horrible?

I stopped because it didn't make me a better citizen. I would get scared, grumpy and mostly anxious about my kids' future.

I grew up in war. I didn't see severed heads or blood everywhere. What I did see were people running scared. Feeling very nervous when we had to be very quiet because you didn't know if it was the enemy coming to attack.

So, I choose not to click on global coverage but to help where I can make a difference...right here in my community and family.

I feel helpless quick frankly. For instance, those little girls who were taken in Africa...we all know about it and I am HORRIFIED...why have they not been returned when they've been ousted? How horrible for those parents. Helpless right now.

Horror overload. I am stopping now because I am not making sense.

However, I will leave with this...I have always since I was young and scared during the fall of Vietnam, that there's always good that comes out of every bad just have to look for it.

Sunday, July 20, 2014

Kiddos of the week

S.E. and Koo have been in soccer camp all week. They played soccer. This is the first time S.E. and his birth friend (sweet and talented E) were in camp together.

At the end of the week, they name players of the week...well both these two got the players of the week for their growth, leadership, good sportsmanship, and teamwork.

Aaahhh. These two started out as rug rats together...her mom and I would nurse and sit around my house or her's and watch our babies grow.

As they grew, more siblings and different activities separated the two. However, she has been more consistent at being S.E.'s friend. He gets embarrassed playing with girls these days so he doesn't make as much of a fuss, but Koo has been filling in with E and her adorable sisters.

Anyway, I digress...pretty neat these two would get extra attention because when they are together, they lift each other up (more like E makes S.E. a better kid).

Maintaining weight loss is tougher than losing weight. There is no reward other than your clothes fit and you continue to have to practice moderation, journaling, and exercising like when you are trying to lose weight...

But finding this balance has always been a struggle for me. I've dropped off of blogland for the past year really because I've been embarrassed that I've managed to gain 2 lbs. /year. This means I went from 129 in 2009 to now 140 in 2014.

I am a size 10. My stomach is sticking out more. I can't fit into my size 8s. It was gradual but deliberate because I threw caution to the wind and stopped tracking or holding myself accountable.

This post is tough for me to write but I'm sure if you've seen me around, YOU KNOW I've gained weight. It doesn't make me a terrible person. I just don't feel comfortable in my own skin. I look down more, avoid activities that would put me in the public more.

I'm back on trying to get this weight off. I can list excuses but those are boring. It's just a matter of eating more than I move.